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  • Whoa! Was That A Cow?

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    Day 3, Evening Edition…

    The following takes place between… Awww, fuggit.

    4:45 PM


    @mrsellars – Fuggit. I’m wearing my sweats for the rest of the evening. Miserable, cold rain… Not going to make pretty.

    @mrsellars – Walkies… Rain… Walkies… Rain…

    @mrsellars – Drip… Drip… Drip…

    @Con_Registration – Raining out there?

    @mrsellars – Nope. I took a shower but couldn’t find my towel.


    @mrsellars – Dry… Dry… Dry…

    @mrsellars – Meet Maria William, artist guest of honor and her husband, Chris. Have dinner with faculty advisor, some alumni, and other GoH’s… Good conversation, good noms.


    @mrsellars – [Mingle Chat Mingle]


    7:30 PM boop, boop, beep, bahp, beep, beep, boop, bahp, bahp, beep, boop… Ring… Ring… Ri!

    @EK – Hello.

    @mrsellars –  It’s here.

    @EK – What’s here?

    @mrsellars – Snow. Flakes the size of compact cars flying sideways. I just saw one take out a cow.

    @EK – Did you get any steaks?

    @mrsellars – Locals beat me to it.

    @EK – You let them get there first? Remind me to beat you when you get home.

    @mrsellars – Yes ma’am.

    @EK – Next cow that goes down you get me some steaks. Got me?

    @mrsellars – Damn, I think a family of badgers just flew past the window.

    @EK – I’m not fond of badger.

    @mrsellars – Yeah, rumor has it they’re afraid of you anyway.

    @EK – They should be.

    @mrsellars – So, according to the weather service Western Nebraska has been completely annihilated. Storm says it is planning to kill all of us too.

    @EK – Hold on just a second. [skree-skrshhh-chunk… riffle…riffle…riffle…] Hmmmm… Okay, I’m back.

    @mrsellars – What’s up?

    @EK – Just checking to make sure your life insurance is paid up.

    @mrsellars – Is it?

    @EK – Yes, sure is. So you can stop whining. Why don’t you go for a long walk.

    @mrsellars – It’s whiteout conditions. You can’t see across the parking lot.

    @EK – Sounds like a good time for you to go exploring, don’t you think?

    @mrsellars – O_o


    @Faculty_Advisor – …And that one, and that one, and maybe that one.

    @mrsellars – I dunno, there isn’t much meat on that one. Maybe a soup bone.

    @Faculty_Advisor – That might work.

    @mrsellars – We’ll need salt. Being students they might be a bit gamey. Gonna want to salt ’em down for a day or two before we cook ’em.

    @Faculty_Advisor – I’ll check the cafeteria.

    @mrsellars – While you’re there, see if they have any garlic and fava beans. No reason for us to be barbaric about it.


    8:00 PM  – Masquerade Contest – GoH’s judge.


    @mrsellars – Whoa mama, E K needs a costume like that… Cool… Good workmanship… That’s one’s neat… Hey, I bet that one took a lot of work… Wow… That one is impressive… Man, that one is cool… Hey, she sings good… Hey, she’s pretty funny… Wow, he put a lot of work into that…

    @mrsellars – [Deliberate] [Discuss] [Deliberate] [Discuss]

    @mrsellars – Need to stop visualizing E K in that costume…


    @mrsellars – Night all… I’m too old for this shit, I’m going to my room to settle in.

    @Con_Folks – Goodnight, Murv!


    @mrsellars – Walkies… Walkies… Walkies…

    @mrsellars – Walkies… Walkies… Lean… Stagger… Lean…

    @mrsellars – Walkies… Walkies…

    @mrsellars – Stumble…


    @mrsellars – [unlock door] [go in] [lock door] [turn on computer] [raise blinds]

    @mrsellars –  {exhausted sigh}

    More to come… (Or, not…)

    Murv

    Note: Satire, observational, humor, ’nuff said. See previous disclaimer. Tired.

  • The Snowman Cometh…

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    And so continues the WillyCon Odyssey, Day 3

    The following takes place between 4 AM and 4 PM. Events occur in real time. (Sutherland still not available. His people are supposed to call my people.)

    4:12 AM – AWAKE!!


    @mrsellars – [looks at time on cell phone] [puts cell phone away] [looks at time on cell phone again…]

    @mrsellars – #fuckme


    @mrsellars – Ears popping, arthritis in knees killing me.

    @mrsellars – [Scratch… Burp… Trudge] [facilities usage]

    @mrsellars – [Trudge]

    @Television – [Click] …and that’s exactly why you need Super Colon Reamer. After just seven days when you look into the toilet you…

    @Television – [Click] …ya’ see. So get your goons outta my way, ya see…

    @Television – [Click] …never shave again. Just apply wax and…

    @Television – [Click] …watching it develop over Colorado and into the plains states. This area here [visual includes Wayne, NE right in the middle of it] is under a Blizzard Warning with a 90% chance of a foot or more…

    @mrsellars – Watch now a warning… #fuckme

    @mrsellars – Now I know why my ears are popping and my knees hurt.

    @mrsellars – I know I already said it, but it warrants a repeat: #fuckme


    7:00 AM


    @mrsellars – Walkies…

    @Analog_Camera – Click – Flash – Whirrrrrr…

    @mrsellars – Walkies…

    @Analog_Camera – Click – Flash – Whirrrrrr…

    @mrsellars – Walkies…

    @Analog_Camera – Click – Flash – Whirrrrrr…

    @mrsellars – Walkies…

    @Analog_Camera – Click – Flash – Whirrrrrr…


    @mrsellars – Apparently Skippy the Squirrel is even more cunning than I first imagined. It would seem he has Internet access and reads my blog.

    @mrsellars – Squirrel jerky and snow suit no longer viable options. Fall back to plan B. Make snowsuit out of blankets. Take empty suitcase to student center and steal food from Convention Hospitality Suite.


    @mrsellars – Walkies….


    @mrsellars – Good morning.

    @Con_Registration_1 – Wow, someone who’s actually up at 7 in the morning.

    @mrsellars – I’ve actually been up since a little after 4.

    @Con_Registration_2 – Nomma himna, ibble.

    @Con_Registration_1 – We haven’t gone to bed yet.

    @mrsellars – I can see that.

    @mrsellars – Where can I get coffee since nothing is open on campus?

    @Con_Registration_1 – Umm… Uhhh…

    @Con_Registration_2 – We didn’t make coffee.

    @Con_Registraton_1 – I can show you where the coffee pot is.

    @mrsellars – Please do.

    @Con_Registration_1 @mrsellars – Walkies…

    @mrsellars – If you turn your back long enough, I’ll just take the coffee pot back to my room (lol).

    @Con_Registration_1 – You can’t do that. We have other people who drink coffee at 5 AM.

    @mrsellars – Yeah, well I was up at 4.

    @Nearby_Faculty_Member – LOL!

    @Con_Registration_1 – O_o


    @mrsellars – [waiting in line for pancake breakfast]

    @Con_Attendee – Oh, hi. [shake hands] It’s nice to meet you. You friended me on Facebook.

    @mrsellars – Yeah, not surprised. I’m like that sometimes.

    @Con_Attendee – I didn’t get a chance to read any of your works. I’ve been pretty busy.

    @mrsellars – [smile] That’s okay. I didn’t get a chance to read any of yours either.

    @Con_Attendee – O_o



    @mrsellars – Nomming on pancakes, sausage, and hash browns.

    @Con_Registration_1 – [nom nom nom] I played Zombies last night.

    @mrsellars – Sounds cool.

    @Con_Registration_1 – My character was like Rambo. D cubed sigma x squared to the power of knife and then other guy teleported the cube root of 24 divided by the remaining integer three paper saving throw on my turn and there were 7 of them when you solve for x by isolating the variable in the quadratic then I killed 21 of them and…

    @mrsellars – O_o

    11:00 AM

    @mrsellars  – Panel = yak, yak, yak, lol, yak, yak

    @mrsellars – Booksigning = yak, sign, yak, sign

    @mrsellars – Lunch = nom, nom, nom

    @mrsellars – Panel = yak, yak, lol, yak, lol, yak, rofl, yak, yak, yakkity, yak, yakky, yakkity, yak, yak…

    @mrsellars – Walkies…


    4:00 PM


    @mrsellars – Current wind speed 587 miles per hour. Eebil rain now falling sideways. Temperature – Extra Cold. Must check weather on toob.

    @Television – Click… Lifts and separates, see…

    @Television – Click… not eating paella…

    @Television – Click… Insurance policy…

    @mrsellars – Why doesn’t this damn thing just stay on the channel where I turned it off?

    @Television – Click… Click… Click… Click… Click…

    @mrsellars – No change… Western Nebraska has been annihilated… Now it’s coming for us.

    @mrsellars – Time to implement  emergency survival plan. Good thing I brought MRE peanut butter and crackers in my luggage.

    More to come…

    Murv