BRAINPAN LEAKAGE

So, the redhead has another guy in her life.

I had been under the impression for the past 25+ years that we were a monogamous couple. However, I guess that was just wishful thinking on my part, because it seems we aren’t.

I’ve suspected there was someone else for quite some time now. But, the evidence was sparse. However, in recent weeks, he has become bolder with each passing day.

I first noticed this boldness a couple of weeks ago. The alarm would sound, and as usual I would climb out of the sack, go start the coffee, and hit the restroom before climbing back into bed to give the redhead her morning backrub. At first it was just something in my peripheral vision, but it wasn’t long before his silhouette was right out there for me to see.

Not long after that, I caught him red handed. You see, when the second alarm goes off, I climb back out of bed, grab a cup of coffee, and head upstairs to the office. One morning a week or so back, I was lagging a bit behind in heading for the coffee pot, probably due to a Benadryl hangover. That’s when he became more than a silhouette. In fact, we literally ran right into one another as he skulked through the door to climb into bed in my place.

He was surprised, as was I. However, it didn’t stop him. No more did I fill my coffee cup and head toward the office than he was cuddled up next to the redhead, loving on her like something out of a really bad bodice ripper.

I guess I can live with it, for now… But I’ll say this: If the fat, furry, tuna-breathed little bastard horks up a hairball on my pillow, he’s toast.

More to come…

Murv

Recently, Her Supreme Evilness, none other than THE E K, tangled with an iceberg that came flying off a flatbed tow truck in front of her while she was motivating the Evil Mobile along the highway. Said iceberg, not knowing with whom it had elected to tussle, was woefully unprepared. While it managed to get in an initial shot, the redhead sallied forth. Because of her amazing display of dominance over flying frozen water, the local news decided to interview her.

HER SUPREME EVILNESS ON THE TOOB

This just goes to show you what I’ve been saying all along – Had E K been on board the Titanic, the damn ship wouldn’t have had the balls to sink.

Personally, I think the Missouri Highway Patrol should give her a “BadAss Beyotch Driving Award” or something. But instead, courtesy of a rather well-known local towing company who couldn’t be bothered to clean off their trucks, we will be going car shopping…

More to come…

Murv