BRAINPAN LEAKAGE

And so continues the WillyCon Odyssey, Day 3

The following takes place between 4 AM and 4 PM. Events occur in real time. (Sutherland still not available. His people are supposed to call my people.)

4:12 AM – AWAKE!!

@mrsellars – [looks at time on cell phone] [puts cell phone away] [looks at time on cell phone again…]

@mrsellars – #fuckme

@mrsellars – Ears popping, arthritis in knees killing me.

@mrsellars – [Scratch… Burp… Trudge] [facilities usage]

@mrsellars – [Trudge]

@Television – [Click] …and that’s exactly why you need Super Colon Reamer. After just seven days when you look into the toilet you…

@Television – [Click] …ya’ see. So get your goons outta my way, ya see…

@Television – [Click] …never shave again. Just apply wax and…

@Television – [Click] …watching it develop over Colorado and into the plains states. This area here [visual includes Wayne, NE right in the middle of it] is under a Blizzard Warning with a 90% chance of a foot or more…

@mrsellars – Watch now a warning… #fuckme

@mrsellars – Now I know why my ears are popping and my knees hurt.

@mrsellars – I know I already said it, but it warrants a repeat: #fuckme

7:00 AM

@mrsellars – Walkies…

@Analog_Camera – Click – Flash – Whirrrrrr…

@mrsellars – Walkies…

@Analog_Camera – Click – Flash – Whirrrrrr…

@mrsellars – Walkies…

@Analog_Camera – Click – Flash – Whirrrrrr…

@mrsellars – Walkies…

@Analog_Camera – Click – Flash – Whirrrrrr…

@mrsellars – Apparently Skippy the Squirrel is even more cunning than I first imagined. It would seem he has Internet access and reads my blog.

@mrsellars – Squirrel jerky and snow suit no longer viable options. Fall back to plan B. Make snowsuit out of blankets. Take empty suitcase to student center and steal food from Convention Hospitality Suite.

@mrsellars – Walkies….

@mrsellars – Good morning.

@Con_Registration_1 – Wow, someone who’s actually up at 7 in the morning.

@mrsellars – I’ve actually been up since a little after 4.

@Con_Registration_2 – Nomma himna, ibble.

@Con_Registration_1 – We haven’t gone to bed yet.

@mrsellars – I can see that.

@mrsellars – Where can I get coffee since nothing is open on campus?

@Con_Registration_1 – Umm… Uhhh…

@Con_Registration_2 – We didn’t make coffee.

@Con_Registraton_1 – I can show you where the coffee pot is.

@mrsellars – Please do.

@Con_Registration_1 @mrsellars – Walkies…

@mrsellars – If you turn your back long enough, I’ll just take the coffee pot back to my room (lol).

@Con_Registration_1 – You can’t do that. We have other people who drink coffee at 5 AM.

@mrsellars – Yeah, well I was up at 4.

@Nearby_Faculty_Member – LOL!

@Con_Registration_1 – O_o

@mrsellars – [waiting in line for pancake breakfast]

@Con_Attendee – Oh, hi. [shake hands] It’s nice to meet you. You friended me on Facebook.

@mrsellars – Yeah, not surprised. I’m like that sometimes.

@Con_Attendee – I didn’t get a chance to read any of your works. I’ve been pretty busy.

@mrsellars – [smile] That’s okay. I didn’t get a chance to read any of yours either.

@Con_Attendee – O_o

@mrsellars – Nomming on pancakes, sausage, and hash browns.

@Con_Registration_1 – [nom nom nom] I played Zombies last night.

@mrsellars – Sounds cool.

@Con_Registration_1 – My character was like Rambo. D cubed sigma x squared to the power of knife and then other guy teleported the cube root of 24 divided by the remaining integer three paper saving throw on my turn and there were 7 of them when you solve for x by isolating the variable in the quadratic then I killed 21 of them and…

@mrsellars – O_o

11:00 AM

@mrsellars  – Panel = yak, yak, yak, lol, yak, yak

@mrsellars – Booksigning = yak, sign, yak, sign

@mrsellars – Lunch = nom, nom, nom

@mrsellars – Panel = yak, yak, lol, yak, lol, yak, rofl, yak, yak, yakkity, yak, yakky, yakkity, yak, yak…

@mrsellars – Walkies…

4:00 PM

@mrsellars – Current wind speed 587 miles per hour. Eebil rain now falling sideways. Temperature – Extra Cold. Must check weather on toob.

@Television – Click… Lifts and separates, see…

@Television – Click… not eating paella…

@Television – Click… Insurance policy…

@mrsellars – Why doesn’t this damn thing just stay on the channel where I turned it off?

@Television – Click… Click… Click… Click… Click…

@mrsellars – No change… Western Nebraska has been annihilated… Now it’s coming for us.

@mrsellars – Time to implement  emergency survival plan. Good thing I brought MRE peanut butter and crackers in my luggage.

More to come…

Murv

Please note that this is not NPR. However, I would like to welcome you to Morning Edition…

Day 2 of 2009: A WillyCon Odyssey (The following takes place between the hours of 5:30AM and 12:00PM. Events occur in real time) <— I tried to get Sutherland for that bit of narration, but he was busy….

5:30 AM – AWAKE!

@mrsellars – There is no java in my room and the Student Center doesn’t open til 7… Oh, Coffee, why hast thou forsaken me?

@mrsellars – Watching morning TV in Wayne NE… Original Adam West Batman movie on… O_o

@mrsellars – Local news is well… Local. Rather be watching @VirginiaKerr and @PaulCooked…

@mrsellars – Jeez… I’m pretty sure I have socks older than that news anchor…

6:30 AM

@mrsellars – @cellphone: boop, boop, beep, bahp, beep, beep, boop, bahp, bahp, beep, boop… Ring… Ring… Ri!

@EK – Hmnomnip?

@mrsellars – Are you up?

@EK – Yam nonno nam nip mmm.

@mrsellars – Okay, just making sure. Didn’t want you to oversleep since I’m not there to wake you up like usual.

@EK – Uhmm nimna hibbit nomma.

@mrsellars – Okay, I’ll let you go then. Love you.

@EK – Wubtoo moo.

@mrsellars – Shower. Check… As coach Verby used to say, “Clean minds, clean bodies.” Well… At least my body is clean.

@mrsellars – Students call cafeteria here the “Gag”. Funny… Noms here are wayyyy better than when I was in College thir-koff-koff years ago.

@mrsellars – Srsly. Noms here really good. A ton to choose from too. Sandwich bar, tostada bar, soups, prepared meals of the day, etc… And they switch up all the time according to what I’m told.

@mrsellars – Had Swiss steak (Northern version = mushroom soup instead of tomatoes and onions, but not bad), steamed veggies, and a salad for dinner last night.

@mrsellars – Salad bar even had beets and unsalted sunflower seeds. How cool is that?

@mrsellars – Looking forward to good noms for breakfast.

@mrsellars – Someone above my head is moving furniture…

@mrsellars – Hmmm… That thud didn’t sound good.

@mrsellars – Wonder if there was a body involved?

@mrsellars – Why yes, now that you ask, everything REALLY IS book material.

@mrsellars – Local weather dude calling for foot of snow, blowing drifts, whiteout conditions.

@mrsellars – SF faculty advisor tells me they’ve been hearing stuff like that for the past couple of weeks and it never comes to fruition.

@mrsellars – Maybe their weather guy needs to talk to Matt Chambers in STL… Pick up a few pointers.

@mrsellars – Hmmmm. Is it Nebraska or is it the fact that it’s a college campus? Man in shorts when 24 degrees not fazing anyone.

@mrsellars – Of course, students are wandering about in t-shirts and ripped jeans. I probably fit right in.

@mrsellars – Familiar odor lingering on the air as I walk to student center. Cow manure. Smells like back home in Kentucky.

@mrsellars – {attack of nostalgia}{wistful sigh}

@mrsellars – Morning noms good. Eggs, pancakes, sausage, mini blueberry muffin, and COFFEE!

@mrsellars – Wonders what these kids would have called the cafeteria where he went to college. :-/

@mrsellars – Hmmm. Place looks almost empty. [Looks Around]

@mrsellars – Oh, wait… A couple of the SF club students I met last night are sitting over there. I should probably sit with them so they don’t think I’m full of myself or something.

@mrsellars – Walkies…

@mrsellars – @students_at_table: Good morning!

@student_1 – [STARE]

@student_1 – Goom nana. Ermm.

@student_2 – [STARE]

@student_2 – Grunt.

@mrsellars – @students_at_table: How’s it goin’?

@student_1 – Nerm goona, arbba tay. Ar ermmm. Nib.

@student_1 – [STARE]

@student_2 – [STARE]

@mrsellars – Umm… Yeah… Klattu Verada Nikto.

@mrsellars – [move to end of table. Enjoy morning noms in silence]

@mrsellars – Remembers his college days… Silently empathizes with the two students.

@mrsellars – Visited with faculty advisor. Signed book. Signed poster. Got more free nom passes for cafeteria.

@mrsellars – SCORE! Found coffee shop on campus. I haz large StarMakeABucks in hand. Life is good.

@mrsellars – Dorm room is about 12 x 24. Two smoke detectors. Must be looking for some pretty sneaky smoke…

ON TWITTER:

@mrsellars – Curse you, Perry the Platypus!

@ perryplatypus – @mrsellars GrRrrRRrRrrRRRrRRrrRr

@mrsellars – Bwuhahahahaha! That just never gets old…

BACK TO PSEUDO TWITTER:

@mrsellars – Temp at 5:30 AM – 24… Now, at 10:30 AM – 44. Supposed to hit 57 before it starts into a nosedive. Then the white shit falls on our heads.

@mrsellars – Camera is loaded and ready.

@mrsellars – Fox squirrels EVERYWHERE. Fat bastards too. Used to see them in MO, but all I ever see there these days are the smaller greys.

@mrsellars – Named one of the reds Skippy this morning. He sat with me and ate acorns while I drank coffee. No shit. Damn near right next to me.

@mrsellars – Tamer than the family of greys I feed at home, and they’re pretty damn tame, so that says something.

@mrsellars – Prevailing theory – the squirrels buddy up to students and sell them the answers to exams. Squirrels are sneaky like that.

@mrsellars – Taking camera with next time.

@mrsellars – You know… Now that I think on it, animals can predict weather even better than Matt Chambers…

@mrsellars – My “country boy sense” is saying these little farts are telling us the sky really is going to dump on us tomorrow.

@mrsellars – #fuckme

11:30 AM

@mrsellars – Coffee empty. Library with coffee shop across campus… Go for more, or relax for a bit and get some when I go for noontime noms?

@mrsellars – Decisions, decisions…

And there you have the morning edition…

More to come…

Murv