BRAINPAN LEAKAGE

So, the other day I posted a Facebook status update that seemed to spark a small firestorm. Well, maybe not a firestorm. Maybe just a box of strike anywhere matches. A lot of flame, really fast, but then sorta gone unless it gets fuel.

Anywho, here’s the stat update:

The overall gist of the flaming box-o-matches came in the form of several “What?”, “Huh?”, and “Say it ain’t so!” sorts of comments. There were also a few direct email type communications taking me to task for being a big doody-head, all because I apparently OWE everyone. However, I pretty much ignored those. The real reason I am writing this blog is to address the “What?” and “Huh?” comments that came from people who either didn’t understand what I was saying, or in some cases, who completely misinterpreted what I was saying.

So here’s the deal: I’m not deleting my Facebook account. That would just be all kinds of stupid, now wouldn’t it? I’m also NOT going to stop writing. Not yet anyway. I suspect I will eventually, but by then I expect to be dead.

All I was trying to say is that I am NOT going to be putting a huge amount of effort into being the online entertainment for everyone on my “friends” list.

Why?

Well, there are various reasons, but let’s start with this: I didn’t join Facebook to play Farmville, Mafia Wars, Befuddled Blatz, or any of that other crap. I joined it as a marketing tool. (GASP!) Yes. I am on Facebook to advertise myself and my books. Not to play games. Not to add as many people to my “friends list” as possible. Not to “be virtually social.”

Now, I will grant you that I DO use Facebook to stay in touch with out-of-town friends, and even some in-town friends. I’ve even used it to reconnect with some family, but let’s face it – 2300+ friends? I don’t think so. Hell, I don’t even know 2300 people. Therefore, we obviously have a situation there, and that situation is that the vast majority of the people on my friends list are actually fans. Nothing wrong with that. Not complaining. Simply illustrating the fact that I am on Facebook to MARKET and ADVERTISE.

And that is what I have been doing. That is exactly what the “Punny Floor Show” has been. Me entertaining people in order to raise “brand awareness.” However, as we know with any commercial on television, or billboard on the highway, eventually an ad campaign wanes in effectiveness. If it didn’t then Black and White Speedy Alka-Seltzer commercials would still be gracing our screens.

So there you have it. Me putting on the pun hat and getting myself a nasty case of swamp ass daily, all in order to raise brand awareness worked for a while. Now it doesn’t anymore. Sure, there are folks who are entertained by the interaction, but it isn’t selling books. In fact, what eventually happened is that I began getting more and more friend requests from people who just wanted to watch the show, but didn’t want to pay the cover charge (i.e. visit a bookstore and buy a book or two. Moreover, a good number of them even claimed that they didn’t like to read and gave me grief over updates that mentioned my books. All they wanted was for me to be funny and entertaining. For free. I’m still trying to figure out how that translates into Ramen Noodles for Murv. My guess is that these folks are related to the people who download music, books, and movies from Torrent sites because they are entitled to them.)

So, maybe this makes me a big asshole. Maybe it doesn’t. The point is, I’m not leaving Facebook. I’m just not going to waste my time behind the keyboard playing the online clown when it is no longer an effective marketing tool.

Yeah, I know, me being pragmatic. Weird. Didn’t even know I had it in me, did you?

More to come…

Murv

There is this absolutely tremendous song by Chip Davis and Mannheim Steamroller. If you own the CD/Album Fresh Aire II, you’ve heard it. If you’ve ever been to one of their concerts, you’ve heard it. In fact, they always play it at the end of their concert. Why? Because, they are going to another place on their tour…

Yeah, I know, “Duh, Murv…”

The thing about this song is that I really love it. In fact, I will find myself humming it often. I’ll even “Guy Sing” it… You know what I mean… That thing guy’s do with songs where instead of just humming, they hum, sing, beat on the furniture,  do vocal sound effects, and generally make an entire show out of humming a song. You don’t see women doing that, as a rule. Just guys. But, I digress…

You see, there’s another facet to the song. It’s bittersweet. It has a great arrangement, it’s catchy, it’s even upbeat, but it means the concert is over. It means the end is near and they will be moving on.

Right now, in my own way, I am tuning up for Going To Another Place.

The fact is, I am living in another place right now. A world that somehow coexists with what everyone else sees as “the world.” It is a place inside my head, and between the pages of novels that are penned by my public alter ego, M. R. Sellars. The thing is, whenever M. R. goes to another place, he tends to take Murv with him, at least for a little while.

Right now, M. R. and Murv are hanging out with some folks that some of you know. There are even some folks there that none of us know. They are in a fictional place, which to them – all of them – is completely and utterly real. Things are happening. The pace is quickening. And, the “end game” is upon them…

Soon, it will be over. Time to pack up, say goodbye, and go to another place. For Murv, the other place will be this place.

M. R. will hang out with the other folks for a while. He always does. But Murv will come back here. He will be shell-shocked, exhausted, and depressed. He’ll miss the folks in that other place. But he’ll get over it. It just takes a little time.

Of course, when M. R. comes back a little while later, he’ll ask about the people and get depressed all over again. And then, before long, M. R. will go off for a visit to the other place again.

Soon after that, Murv will get a call. It will be time for him to pack his bags and go to that other place, so that he can start the music all over again…

Cue Chip and the gang…

More to come…

We hope.