BRAINPAN LEAKAGE

They say a picture is worth 1000 words. I’ve never really been absolutely certain who “they” are, but they get quoted quite a bit. I guess it’s just one of those things. Personally, I’ve always sort of agreed with the concept, but then I’ve also been known to say why use 1000 words if 500 will do. I’m sort of divided like that. I know it doesn’t seem like I would only use 500 words instead of 1000 when you read my blogs, but that’s just because I have so many excess words left over from not using them elsewhere. Have to get rid of them somehow, and here seems to be the dumping ground…

But anyway… Back to that whole picture thing. The other night we were visiting friends for a gala “TikkiToberfest” party. You know the drill – sort of a blend between German and Polynesian culture. Hawaiian shirts, Lederhosen, Poi, Brats, Beer, and Fruity Drinks served in hollowed out pineapples with little paper umbrellas. A typical Saturday night party. Well, as it would happen, our host, Dave, had a mess of Habanero peppers on hand to go with the meal. Being a fan of peppers I had a couple. They were good. Excellent, in fact. However, as generally happens with large amounts of capsicum sticking to your tongue, a cupcake and mass quantities of beer were required to douse the fire.

THIS is where I learned an important lesson: Habanero Peppers + Red Velvet Cupcakes + Beer = A Very Powerful Hallucinogen.

How do I know this?

Well, to begin with, I consumed all three – duh. However, what really clinched it was when I went into the bathroom and saw the Zombie Cat.

Yes. A Zombie Cat. Kitten really. There it was, rolling around on its back as kittens will do, playing with some brains. Not really all that surprising, given that most cats like to play with their food, so why wouldn’t a Zombie Cat as well?

When I went back outside to the fire pit I announced this to everyone. I don’t think they believed me… that was, until my good friend, Celeste “The Blonde Bombshell” Webster went to investigate. With her trusty phone she snapped a picture for all to see… And there it is above, a 1000 word photo to go with the 389 regular words I just typed.

More to come…

Murv

So… A week or so back I posted a quick blog entitled Q&A: In That Order, or something of that sort… Who knows for sure. I don’t even pay attention to me anymore.

At any rate, I said I would answer questions in a blog entry for the 15th, so here it is. I also said I’d wait until the 12th for all the questions. Then I realized I was leaving town at Oh-Dark-Thirty on the 12th and wouldn’t have a chance to see those questions. Well, doesn’t seem like I had to worry. As I said, I don’t pay attention to me anymore, and it seems not many folks out in the blog-o-sphere do either. What I mean is, I got a few questions right off the bat, and only a couple of those were actually serious. But, after that, not so many views of the post. That seems to be the case across the board.

I guess that means folks are becoming bored across the board. With me at least.

Again, who knows…

Anywho, as promised, here are the questions and answers. If you have more, feel free to leave them, and maybe I will answer. Or, maybe I’ll ignore them.

Again, who knows…

• kat says:

  May 30, 2011 at 7:33 pm

  i have been curious for awhile. i am a fan of long hair, my spouse has long hair my stepson and myself also. so…did you set a milestone for yourself? when you cut your hair i mean! ty if you answer!

Heya, Kat… There wasn’t an actual milestone. I’ve had, or did have, long hair since high school. I had some short periods in there, but for twenty-odd years my hair was long, and for most of that, long enough that it was in a fairly substantial ponytail. Then, one day after being “off the road” for a couple of months I had to pack my suitcase so that I could hop onto a big, winged rocket-propelled cattle car, and head off to a foreign land (read: not home) to do a gig. As I stood there looking at all of the stuff I was cramming into my suitcase it dawned on me that I was packing around an awful lot of “hair product,” so to speak. Too much.

Basically it came down to the fact that hair care was taking over my suitcase. I decided it would be way easier to manage, and to pack for, if I had shorter hair. So, I did the only thing I could do. I asked The Redhead. Why? Because I once shaved off my beard without her permission and I still have scars from that incident.

Anywho, Her Supreme Evilness said, “Yeah. I think you are due for a change.”

I said, “My fans will probably be upset.”

To which she replied, “Who do you live with, your fans or ME.”

And so, I got a haircut. Just as an aside, the 16 or so inches of hair went to Locks of Love…

• Gina says:

  May 30, 2011 at 7:38 pm

  So if the book you just finished writing is “In the Bleak Midwinter,” featuring Constance Mandalay…. whatcha got cooking that is due in December? Thrilled we’re gonna get two M.R. Sellars books in such a short period of time!

Writing for a smaller press has advantages and disadvantages. Mostly advantages, but among the disadvantages is that my deadlines are tighter since they move through the editorial process quicker. What that means is that instead of turning in a manuscript and seeing it on the shelves 8-12 months later, it is usually more like 3-6. Sometimes faster if I’ve had to ask for an extension on my deadline.

So… With ITBM in the can, what is next on my plate is finishing up #11 in the RGI series, which I had already been writing when I took the break to do ITBM. Once I finish that, I will be hopping on board the Constance train again, as the publisher has already asked for two more in the Constance Mandalay series.

• Tasialue says:

  May 30, 2011 at 7:38 pm

  So, was Uncle Fred secretly working FOR the government, field testing plague serums on unsuspecting homeless folks? ‘Cause I think he was…

For those who may have never attended my “Magickal Ethics” workshop, “Uncle Fred” plays a big role in a “Kobyashi Maru” no-win scenario I present to the class. The point behind the scenario is not to see if you can pull a Kirk and cheat your way out of it. The point is to present you with a situation that makes you think. The idea being that if you leave the workshop looking for aspirin, then I have done my job to make you think about ethics and how they apply to our everyday lives. Note I said, “make YOU think.” I’ve already done plenty of that on the subject, hence the workshop. The idea is for YOU to have the headache, not ME. However, as you can see, Ms. Tasialue didn’t get a headache. She is just being a headache.

That said… No. He wasn’t. It’s all just a Fig Newton of your imagination.

• Schueyman says:

  May 31, 2011 at 10:17 pm

  What do you call that place on the inside of your arm where your elbow bends? And what about the corresponding area behind your knee?

Antecubital fossa and popliteal fossa, respectively. Neither of these are any relation to Dian Fossa or Bob Fossa. Nor are they related to Dian Fossey or Bob Fossey, just so we’re clear.

(Thanks to my friend Doctor Gina Witt for the anatomical info…)

• Schueyman says:

  May 31, 2011 at 10:18 pm

  Why is there air?

Per Doc Witt – So you won’t collapse due to not having something expanding your skin.

However, as I’ve known you, Mister Schueyman, for thirty-odd years, I highly suspect the answer you are looking for is:

“To blow up volleyballs. Any PhysEd major knows that…”

• dee says:June 1, 2011 at 10:49 pmWhat, is your name?
  What, is your quest?
  What, is the average airspeed of a cocoanut-laden swallow?

Lord Stainless Steel Thundermonkey.

To do everything in my power to please The Evil Redhead.

African or European?

There you go…

More to come…

Murv