BRAINPAN LEAKAGE

I keep stuff.

No… I’m not a hoarder. Well… Not in the sense of having piles of crap everywhere. In fact, as we have aged, E K and I have been streamlining and jettisoning our excess crap. What I’m talking about keeping is information. In particular, electronic documents containing cut and pastes of things I found interesting, things I’ve written, notes I’ve taken… That sort of stuff. So, while it is a bit of a hoarding situation, at least my stash is contained to a 1 terrabyte HD that still has all sorts of room on it – therefore, when I up and croak, my kid isn’t going to have to do much other than hit delete… Unless, of course, she decides to sell the info to someone. Who knows? Some of what I wrote might be worth a nickel or two after I’m all corpsified.

So, anyway, as I was organizing my electronic piles of data, I ran across one of my exchanges on FB that I had felt compelled to copy and paste. I still get a chuckle out of it. Y’all might too. Or not.

ME: Dining room floor stripped, scrubbed, steamed, waxed, and buffed. Supper installed. Now continuing Beer 6.0 installation.

MARY: wow! I can’t seem to find that program on the microsoft website… can you direct me? I will even buy a pirate copy if needed. LOL!

ME: Which one, Mary? Beer 6.0 or adult playdate? 🙂

MARY: Beer 6.0 I don’t need – I have Wine 6.0; Adult playdate is already installed and currently running, I’m talking Handyman 7.0. LOL!

ME: Ohhhh, that one. Well, you see Handyman 7.0 is a forced install by my sysadmin, E K and it takes some adjunct software to get it running. She generally starts with booting into her secondary operating system, Dominatrix 8.2.6, then locally installs Stiletto Heels 5.0, Leather 9, and Whip 10.7A. After that she does a remote format then pushes a ghost image of Subservient Husband 4.2 across the network. Once SH is up and running all versions of Handyman, up to and including 8.0 Beta install with no issues whatsoever.  She’s invested quite a bit in the upgrades too. I can’t begin to name them all, but in the way of add-on modules she even has stuff like Electrician 2.8, Groundskeeper 3.0, Chef 2.1, Masseur 5.9, and Plumber 1.5.3 (although she hacked the latter to insert a “no butt crack” subroutine)…

And there you have life at my house…

More to come…

Murv

I happen to be a big fan of Father Guido Sarducci.  One of my favorite stories of his involves Carr-dih-naal-uh Foon-gee… The story is funny, but the name is downright hilarious.

Well, that’s not what this is about. I know, never is…

You see, when you have a really demanding redhead in your life – yes, E K – and you have to cook for her, you tend to start getting creative. ESPECIALLY when she decides that she, her personal doormat (that being moi), and everyone else entering the hallowed halls of La Casa de la Pelirrojas will be going 80% vegetarian.

I say 80% because in order to keep up the strength in her whip arm, she does like to have some fish or fowl now and then. And, on special occasions she likes a piece of dead cow. But as I said, those would be the special occasions…

And so, this is where I get Czar Foon-Gee. You see, Her Supreme Evilness is a fan of Beef Stroganoff. However, if you are trying to be mostly, sorta, 80% vegetarian, heaping a mess of dead, floured, fried, and braised Moo on your plate really isn’t the way to go.

So, as I was taking my daily beating from the evil redhead, for whatever infraction I had, or had not, perpetrated that day, I got to thinking – how can I whomp up some non-beef beef stroganoff?

Well, there are several ways to go about it, but since a good hunk of the recipe already revolves around fungus – that being mushrooms, of course – I thought, why not build upon that.

And so, I did…

CZAR FOON-GEE

(Mushroom Stroganhoff To Feed The Evil Redhead – Serves 6-8)

Not the best pic... This was a trial run and was missing the oyster mushrooms, plus I only had regular egg noodles on hand that day...

Ingredients

• 2 Large Portobello Mushrooms
• 8 ounces Crimini Mushrooms
• 8 ounces Oyster Mushrooms
• 1 Large Zucchini Squash
• 1 Small Vidalia Onion
• 4 ounces butter
• 4 tablespoons all-purpose flour
• 1 Cup Vegetable Stock (Preferably Homemade)
• 1 Tbsp Tomato Paste
• 1/2 cup sour cream
• 1/3 cup white wine
• salt to taste
• ground black pepper to taste
• Olive oil