BRAINPAN LEAKAGE

It can be a little disconcerting to see your wife jump out of a helicopter and into a river. But then, there’s very little that isn’t disconcerting about Her Supreme Evilness. Take for instance the fact that she isn’t who she says she is.

Hell… She isn’t even who she thought she was.

I suppose that sort of comes with the territory, though. I mean, when you are trained by a covert government organization such as the KGB – which actually stands for Kill Goddamned Bugs, by the way – and then put into place as a sleeper agent for RAID with a code name of Evil… Well, let’s just say there can be some identity issues.

Of course, oddly enough, she embraced the Evil part right out of the gate. I mean, as in even before she was “activated.” Probably has something to do with the red hair.

But anyway… The truth came out as soon as the Japanese Beetles showed up. Next thing you know E K was extracting venom from spiders, riding around on buses, blowing up funerals, shooting up the general area, killing off various exterminators, and infiltrating the corporate offices of nationwide pest control companies in search of the launch codes for their arsenal of ICPM’s (Intra-Continental Pyrethrin Missiles).

However, like I said, the last time I saw her she was jumping out of a helicopter. Apparently there are “many more” rogue beetles remaining in the U.S. and Evil is on a revenge binge…

More to come…

Murv

Plot, Poster, and Tagline parodied from SALT (2010)